Alice: First off, I’d like to say this is a wonderful place to raise a family. Many a fort were built by my two girls in this very room.
Betty: And bonus, it’s also where my serial killer father showed us creepy snuff films.
Alice: [She laughs] Elizabeth! Shouldn’t you be at school?
[Alice changes topics]
Alice: We have wonderful schools in this district. Oh, I see that you eying the fireplace, which is original to this house.
Betty: Yes, which comes with accessories, like the shovel, which my mother used to knock out my father, the notorious serial killer, “The Black Hood.”
Alice: It’s true, you can Google it. But make sure you look up “Alice Cooper” and not “Alice Smith.” It’s all there. Or try “Murder House on Elm Street.” That’s this house.
Toni: Babe, you wear many hats.
Cheryl: Stunningly.
Toni: But when you put on that purple jacket, you represent our gang. And now Weatherbee is out for our blood!
Cheryl: I can handle Weatherbee.
Toni: Cheryl, I don’t want to have to suspend anyone for loose cannon behavior. Least of all my own girl friend.
