Frasier
Thursdays on Paramount+Alan Cornwall Quotes
Frasier: Whatever I did for my father, it wasn’t enough because whatever I did, I could never repay him.
Alan: And you don’t want to burden Freddy because, in your eyes, you weren’t there for him either.
Frasier: Exactly.
Frasier: Do they give out prizes for Best Father?
Alan: I believe they give out mugs, but I don’t think they’re terribly exclusive.
Frasier: Surely, there must be some sort of an alternate route to professorship, a Crane lane, if you will.
Alan: Well, you know, Olivia, Frasier, and I have the same level of education. We have the same experience as psychiatrists. We’re basically doing the same job, except that I’m a professor and he’s not.
Olivia: And you think that’s unfair?
Alan: No, I’m just gloating.
Frasier: It’ll be my time to shine once I show Frederick his gift.
Alan: Ah, a pen. Are you going to use it to write down what the present is?
Frasier: Growing up, Freddy’s favorite book was The Cather in the Rye. So, I did some legwork today, and I was able to secure this pen once owned by J. D. Salinger.
Good for you, Frasier. I’ve always admired your dewy-eyed optimism, you know, even though love’s been punching you in the face for the last, what, three decades.
Alan: We’re very proud of you. The way you’ve lurched from one failed marriage to another. I mean, I’ve lost count. It must be, what, three?
Freddy: Two, technically.
Frasier: Thank you, Freddy.
Freddy: Yeah, the third one, he just got left at the altar.
Frasier: This is a big joke. Does anything actually matter to you?
Alan: I can think of two things I actually care deeply about. My cat and you.
Frasier: I was sure you were going to say Scotch.
Alan: I know I can be flippant about things and that you've had to pay the price, so I'm sorry if I've mucked things up again.
Frasier: This place is so stuffy. I love it.
Alan: It's like the sort of place you retire to after a long day of hunting man.
Frasier: You know, when I was back in Boston, I used to be a regular at a bar, and yet…
Alan: Nobody knew your name?
Alan: I lied about the door being locked.
Frasier: What? You mean the door's been unlocked all this time?
Alan: No, no. Have a look. There isn't a door.
Frasier: You've locked me in a room without a door!
Alan: You will rue the day you fought me over Shakespeare and Middleton. You know, you have made the greatest mistake of your life.
Eve: The greatest mistake of my life was not saying I love you to my boyfriend the morning he left and never came back.
Alan: Well, you’ve made the second greatest mistake of your life.
Alan: You’re rich. You’re famous. Your students love you. For some reason, you smell naturally of sandalwood. What more could you possibly want?
Frasier: I wanted to make an impact. I wanted to realize the potential I had when I set off on this career path forty years ago.
