Community Season 1 Quotes
Britta: The real reason men fight is to release their pent-up gayness.
Pierce: That guy wasn't gay, he had a mustache.
Pierce: So what's the deal Jeff, you leave your stones in your other suit? Why didn't you wrap that guy in the face?
Jeff: For the same reason I floss, have a bed frame, and keep my guitar in its case. I'm over 23.
Bully: Give me a winter doodle.
Jeff: If you're trying to be menacing, maybe you shouldn't call the cookie by its name.
Shirley: I made you all a little gift because you're like my new family.
Annie: WWBJD?
Pierce: If it stands for "What Would Billy Joel Do?", I'll tell you right now, he'd write another crappy song.
Troy: Yeah, in your face Billy Joel.
[Troy mouths who is that to Annie, who mouths back I don't know]
Shirley: It stands for "What Would Baby Jesus Do?"
Happy last day before winter break. Time to visit our loved ones. Some of you will travel as far as 3 miles! Don't forget to visit our winter wonderland in the quad where were giving away up to six semester of free classes. Wow, what's that sound? Is that the tip tapping of secular boots on on the roof? That must be another sign that it 'tis the season because rumor has it that non-denominational Mr. Winter is on his way to the student lounge.
Dean
You've never seen one on the Internet, or in pictures, or Harvey Keitel's?
Shirley
Pierce: At some point a man stops looking for a place to hang his underwear and starts looking for a place to hang his hat.
Jeff: I'm sorry I was waiting for that to become inappropriate or racist.
Troy: That's it, we're arm wrestling.
Abed: Like Stallone in Over the Top? I'm not sure about the rules, don't I need a semi truck and a ten year old son?
Jeff: Just this morning as I was shaving while listening to some Jay-Z, I was thinking about going for a gallop.
Secretary: Do you own a horse?
Jeff: Can you ever really own a horse?
The dean is counting me on. I have to make sure he knows someone he can trust. We have to break into his office.
Annie
Being a Virgin in this day and age is something to be proud of, you're like a unicorn.
Shirley [to Annie]
it's impossible to guard you, your eyes are too gentle and mysterious.
Troy [to Abed]
