Excuse me, no one does a better job at pretending to be a person than I do. Siri comes close, but I know more jokes.

Sheldon

• Permalink: Excuse me, no one does a better job at pretending to be a person than I do. Siri comes close,...
• Added: November 12, 2015

Amy: Some people think the sexiest organ is the brain.
Penny: No one ever bought me drinks at a bar because my brain just popped out of my shirt.

• Permalink: No one ever bought me drinks at a bar because my brain just popped out of my shirt.
• Added: November 12, 2015

You eat it. You're married. It doesn't matter what you look like.

Sheldon

• Permalink: You eat it. You're married. It doesn't matter what you look like.
• Added: November 12, 2015

He's having a rough time. Amy broke his heart. The DVR cut off the last minute of Dr. Who. That crow followed him home.

Leonard

• Permalink: He's having a rough time. Amy broke his heart. The DVR cut off the last minute of Dr. Who....
• Added: November 12, 2015